Jeeps Like White Elephants

I am a self-confessed public transportation junkie. Apart from the fact that my love for commuting spares pedestrians from my maniacal driving and allows me to rest during precious transit time (while saving the planet too), I am utterly convinced that riding buses, trains, commuter vans, and the like helps me stay connected with people. It gives me moments to observe the bittersweet complexity of human existence -- the many frustrations and little joys of the daily goings-on of the middle-class life.

But if there is one thing I loathe about commuting in the metropolitan jungle we call Metro Manila (aside from the slow-paced traffic and greedy bus operators who think maximum loading capacities are mere polite suggestions), it is the outdated, non-aerodynamic, clunky, noisy, and smoke-belching public utility vehicle popularly known as the jeepney.

I will not deny that I ride it almost everyday. But that won't stop me from rallying against it. This tin can of death is an invitation to disaster every time it rages like a maniacal mechanical pitbull in heat on the streets -- haphazardly weaving without care for fellow vehicles or pedestrians.

In an era of sustainability, eco-friendliness, and human advancement, nothing says "I'm a death sentence to the planet straight from the Mesozoic Transportation Era" more than the jeepney. It's funny how we even showcase it to tourists, who can only help but smile and wonder silently why this piece of junk is a source of pride to anyone (until they realize that they are, after all, in the Philippines.)

But then, before someone brings up that there are actually foreigners who find it charming, take note that it is likely the same way they find "Slumdog Millionaire"'s deplorable poverty charming too. Which makes their outbursts of awe and glee for the jeepney more of a mockery to our state of existence than a compliment to our ingenuity. (And ingenuity, please! The jeepney hasn't evolved much since the war!)

I hope they phase this out soon. To start, the government should mandate that those still in the jeepney manufacturing business should cease their productions in the next three years. Considering the jeepney's life expectancy, that would mean PUJs would be gone by 2025. And while that gradually happens, the government should already plan to intensify alternative means of transportation (thus, more trains!)

I seriously can't wait. I dream to see the day that the only jeepneys I'll see will be the ones on display inside museums. Good riddance!

This, my friends, is what Manila is to foreigners.